I'm now no longer a KOTO employee.
Yesterday was the last day and with it came the goodbye speeches, the presents, the flowers, the food and the drinks.
And, of course, the tears.
I had known for a long time that leaving would be a huge wrench. I had known that I would be expected to make a speech. I also knew that every time I went through that speech in my head I welled up to a point where I just had to forget about it.
I have watched others trying to do it. It's never pretty.
So the moment came. Our new CEO said some extraordinarily kind things about me and it was my turn to speak. Oanh, my colleague and great friend over the past 27 months was translating.
I started off okay. I told the 100 trainees and staff present how proud I had been of KOTO and how sad I was to leave. I told them that we are the first KOTO and later, when there are KOTOs across the world, we can be so proud of that.
Then Oanh broke.
She was suddenly in floods or tears and couldn't go on. Miss Nga took over and I admitted quietly to her that I didn't know if I could finish. Between us Nga and I sobbed a much shortened version of what I had wanted to say.
It must have been quite a sight for the trainees.
I spent the next hour hugging sobbing kids with my t-shirt slowly getting wetter. Miss Ly from class eight broke my heart.
I'm not a very group hug kind of bloke but I must have had my arms around seven or eight of them at a time.
It's not easy for me to write this. Even now, as I type the tears are flowing again.
I don't know why it makes me like this. I'm ready to go and have chosen to go. I guess it's just an over flowing of emotions. So much is coming together. Twenty seven months of living with these amazing people and sharing so much. And me being so inspired and so humbled by them.
Eventually I tore myself away and started to move downstairs where staff were waiting to go out to dinner. My regular xe om driver crossed the street with his motorbike and one last time we set off.
There we were, a dozen or so staff on motorbikes, and all around trainees pedaling furiously on their pushbikes, trying to keep up. I waved them goodbye as we sped along Thuy Khue Street. That cinematic thing again. Just when did my life turn into a movie? So many priceless moments that I have been so lucky to enjoy.
Later at the restaurant my phone rang. Thu from Class Seven rang from the Softel Plaza. I have no idea how he got my number. He was working and hadn't be able to say goodbye but he wanted to say good luck. Then Chien from Class Six called. Then Miss Lung, now working in the Guoman.
More speeches, flowers and a present that floored me. For over two years I have been flogging bricks to raise money for KOTO's new home. Now KOTO has bought me one.
It will stay forever in the new restaurant. Just perfect.
The evening went on in happy fashion. Later, more zig zagging on motorbikes to a bar and a few drinks.
Today I woke up with nowhere to go. I had a strange long breakfast and did some Christmas shopping. Then I sneaked into KOTO to clear my desk. Two more presents from the trainees broke my heart all over again. The first from class ten and the second from Miss Lung with a note.
I am so proud of what we have achieved at KOTO. So proud just to be a part of it. So proud that the new KOTO is going happen.
And if you'll forgive me the indulgence, I'm proud I stuck it out. Not just the two years but the extra time to see this through.
It is easily the single best thing I have ever done with my life.
My future has many more adventures ahead but I will see and experience nothing like this ever again. I am the luckiest guy in the world to do this.
Finally, like I said, I am no longer a KOTO employee. But, like 200 kids who have gone through the KOTO program before me, I will always be KOTO family.
That's just one more thing to be proud of.
Thank you everybody at KOTO. Your future promises to be very bright.